Welcome back Muby

Can’t believe an entire week has passed since I last wrote. What kept me away for so long? I know I procrastinated and made excuses. But obviously that was a cover-up for something much more. Something which I didn’t have the courage to say earlier, but I should now. I should because unless I let it go from my system, it will remain within and fester.
So here’s my confession. I got so caught up in the here and now, so involved on the outside, that I neglected the inside. I wasn’t listening to that little voice going “oh oh! Don’t go there”.
I allowed myself to be surrounded by negativity and cribbing. I allowed the words to hit my ears and sink into me. I’d end up carrying other people’s negativity on my shoulders, until it became a dark cloud over my head. I stopped focusing on love first thing every morning and last thing every night. I stopped sending my angels to those in need. I stopped feeling from within, and I ended up without.
Until last night, when I decided to be selfish. I made a conscious decision to step away from the whining and complaining and cribbing and crying. I sat at home and entered my own head. I closed my eyes and felt roots connect my body to the sand beneath me. I heard little Snickers playing with his chewie by my side. It was a sound that gave me immense comfort. I allowed the summer breeze to carress my face, the smell of the trees with their sleeping flowers to gleefully invade my senses. I pictured me hunch-backed, dragging the weight of others over my shoulder like a sack full of dead rocks. I saw how miserable I looked doing that. I felt how unhappy I was because every nerve in my being was focusing on the unpleasant duty of carrying those rocks. I stood up, put the bag down, said a silent goodbye and walked away. As I walked away I grew taller and lighter. My face started glowing. I could feel all the thoughts emanating from my middle. I felt love. I felt courage. I felt peace. I felt calm. I felt life. Eternal and majestic in all it’s raw beauty. Giving thanks for such a miracle didn’t seem enough. I looked up at my universe and laughed. I laughed and laughed until I laughed that bag of rocks away. And as I laughed, the trees grew around me, the butterflies came back, the bird chirped, Sneaks ran around in crazy little circles. All felt right. I was connected. I was grounded. I flew up high, while my roots swirled and twirled to their own beats on the earth.
In that moment another Muby turned up. She was me, but she wasn’t me. She’s been around so much longer, her soul so much older. She reminded me never to allow people to force their cloak of negativity over my shoulders. She told me not to underestimate my energy. Not to tarnish my aura, not to fall into the trap of nothingness. She reminded me that a smile begets another smile, joy, attracts joy, goodness makes the way for even more goodness, and all people come with their own karma. She spoke the infinitely wise words of Wayne Dyer, “How people treat you is their karma. How you react is yours.”
And I have to admit I had all too easily fallen into the rut of following their doctrine of unhappiness. I barely spoke to my universe all week. My mood ring stopped showing spiritual growth. I was stunted, and I allowed it to happen.
But the girl from last night took it all away. She helped me reconnect to me. She realigned my path with the universe. She gave me my powers back. Just like others pulled out a little vial of negative energy and splashed it around my aura, she took out a vial of positivity and doused me in it from head to toe. It felt like an awakening. I’m overjoyed to have found my heart again. I feel like me, I feel lighter, I feel stronger, I feel calmer, I feel happier. I am alive. I am at peace. With each breath, I radiate that peace, with each word, I spread the love. That’s my way of being.
As I said last week, each of us needs to be. In their own unique way. This is mine.

Another world

Imagine a room, a dark room, where the only light comes from the tip of a burning incense stick. Imagine that room soaked in the aroma of the incense. It’s a room filled with peace and light. There’s a strong feeling of love passed on from one body to another. It’s a room where the souls are hovering above their bodies, playing, dancing and teasing with their angels, with each other’s angels, seeing angels as far as the eye can see. The bodies that house those souls lie motionless on the padded floor. Some cry, others sleep, a few smile. No one moves, saves the souls who continue their dance with the angels. Outside the full moon shines pure and bright.
I lie there watching myself lie there. Soon I leave me behind and I’m off on a magical journey to a land far away, so far that time and space cease to exist, making it the nearest possible place I could be in at that moment. I’m on my own. I float, I fly, I cleanse, I heal. Yet I feel the others there. I feel connected by an invisible bond that my subconscious has acknowledged. I am asked to let go. I try. I really do. It’s not happening. And then in massive gobs and spurts, it comes gushing out of me. I watch myself letting go as though it’s a physical process. I sense that somewhere in another place, others are doing the same. I feel far away yet connected to the now. I feel the room get lighter. I see the hurt flying away. I feel a burst of light going through my body. I see that light, I allow it to go through me, through every single part of me. I welcome it for it takes away the weight. The smiling faces around me start glowing. Their wings encircle me in a ring of protection. They lift me up until I’m flying with them. I feel tiny, I feel big, I’m a giant, I’m a little girl, I’m a woman, I’m a child… This me keeps morphing, going to different versions of me that were holding on to different elements. Each version of me had something to let go. I never allowed those me’s that privilege before. Now I wonder why I ever denied it.
I open my eyes and the peace and calm of the room reassures me. It’s the perfect landing after my journey though space. A journey on which I lost a lot of my baggage and returned feeling lighter than before. A little tree of confidence was planted in my spine. It’s still young, but grow it will. And its fruits will be among the sweetest. I know this. I saw this. I believe this.

Waiting for the perfect world

Sometimes I don’t understand people. Correction. A lot of the time I don’t understand people. Take for example this morning. Walking into the place I normally walk into five days a week, I can’t help but look around, make eye contact, exchange a smile or two on my way to the coffee machine, then head to my regular spot, chirpy and happy in the here and now. And you probably know what happens next.
Gloomy faces all around. Sombre expressions telling tales of sorrow and despair. It’s the face I’d adopt if the bodies on this planet abandoned their souls and set about on a quest of hatred. So why such extreme doom and gloom 9am in the morning then? I sat and tried to figure it out. I took a little walk and kept trying to figure it out. Mulled over a coffee desperately trying to find out why. I tried and I tried, and I’m still trying even now.
Why the gloom? Could everyone have gotten out the wrong side of bed this morning? Not that I agree with that term anyway. I mean, what’s the wrong side? A bed’s a bed. It fulfills its mission to give you warmth and comfort upon contact. How can that have the word wrong attached to it in any way? And what's with the word “wrong” in the first place? Who created it? What’s wrong? What’s right? Who decides? Who has the right to? Right, wrong, good, bad, sin, grace… it’s all subjective. It’s all personal.
But I digress. Back to the uncalled for gloom.
… Actually, hang on a tic. I think I want to digress. Not necessarily to being against the concept of wrong, but to anything else. There’s enough pompousness, ego and grumpiness all around as it is, without me adding my energy to the mix by writing about it. Because, by writing about a thing, I’m automatically condoning it, accepting it, allowing it to be, to manifest. Ordinarily, who am I to deny anything its existence, but gloom, ego, anger and jealously … it hurts to even write down those words.
So let’s not. Let’s imagine a perfect world, with little butterflies of hope carrying messages of love. A world where people smile like retards (not the scary smiles though), a world where difference is celebrated, instead of fought over. A world minus war, religion and politics. A world of purple breezes and blue skies. A world without borders. A world rich in colour, where every kid has a reserve 10kg bag of candy, every animal has a loving environment to call home, every plant grows wild and free, every man love the other, every woman stands strong, where prejudices are a thing of the past and people, black, while, brown, yellow, straight, gay, tall, short, rich and poor all stand shoulder to shoulder, creating a circle of love, illuminating the purest of light and living as one.
Bet that made you crack at least the hint of a smile, huh?

James

The blog’s gaining popularity. People are talking, brains are buzzing, souls are searching. I’m getting feedback on what makes sense and what ticked who off. Apparently the War entry wasn’t the most appreciated. Moz wants revenge for tainting James’ words. I need to make peace. James didn’t say “the best way towards peace is by preparing for war” (see the War entry). He said “the way to secure peace is to prepare for war”. Big difference huh? He still said prepare for war. But that’s just my opinion. Form your own. That’s what the world needs more of. People with their own opinion. Not blind followers of years and centuries of propaganda and ass-wipe. So Moz, I don’t agree with James. But respect for having an opinion.

War

I have this friend called Moz. He’s my bro’s bestest. But more of their tirades later. Moz just said to me that the best way towards peace is to prepare for war. His friend James told him that. I don’t know about that. Or maybe I do, James. Preparing for war, means keeping the notion of war in your head. And keeping a notion of anything in your head means attracting that very element into your life. What will happen is the universe will bring war unto you, since you’re putting all your energy into the very word. Why else James, do you think there’s all this fighting everywhere? Because the world, in it’s hastiness to attract peace through war, has brought war to itself.